Updated: Nov 4, 2020
Oh my goodness, loves, there is so much coming this month it's hard to contain it all, hence the shoring of boundaries. We are still working with the container energy, only this month we are crystalizing our boundaries. What's healthy or unhealthy for us is becoming crystal clear, and as such, the knowledge of our gifts, who we truly are, and how we are here to serve is coming more rapidly into view. In order that we focus more on that (the good, the healthy, the nourishing) we must allow our boundaries to calcify, calling us forward on our path, going deeper into relationship and intimacy with ourselves, so we can hear our own voices louder than those of others (the ones that are negative, unhealthy and divisive that long to pull us off our path, if even unconsciously so).
We are cleaning off those gems found at the bottom of our dark, solitary containers. This is bittersweet and painful work. At once we find these dark, seemingly unsavory bits, only to spend time with them and discover that with a touch of attention and nurturing these are actually our most valuable gifts; the things we have loved about ourselves the most, but hadn't been given permission to own. Those gifts were so bright, they threatened others, and so we were taught to push them down to make others less uncomfortable.
And in walks Kali, goddess of time, to stop all this nonsense, cut to the truth, and help us claim our sacred feminine, wholeheartedly and unabashedly. She is the Hindu goddess that holds a sickle and sword, blood dripping from her tongue, necklace of skulls, skirt of arms, defeating the demon by drinking the drops of his blood that would otherwise have continued regenerating from each drop. She is often mistaken as the goddess of death or destruction because of this. From the link above written by Annalisa Merelli "The myth wants her to be bloodthirsty and uncontrollable, while Shiva, the male god, is wise and in control: But this, Singhal notes, is just the male retelling of the story, shaped by centuries of patriarchal values." This is exactly where we are in history, and so it's no doubt why Kali is here to help. We have been told we aren't as powerful as we most certainly are (women in particular, and feminine energy in general), and so Kali is here to remind us to embody "the boundless and existential freedom to be — without seeking permission."
This gives a nod to what I've been speaking about for several weeks now that the wisdom is coming up out of the earth and there is no avoiding it anymore. The truth of who we are is here to stay, and only grow, so that we can build a more just world going forward, one that balances both masculine and feminine energy, honoring them both. And so we are in this period of excising the wound. All the puss that has been held under the surface must rise and be fully flushed out. This will most likely come in the form of deep wounds being uncovered. Let it come. Let it all come. Cry on the floor, wail, scream, beat the pillows, tear at your clothes, break dishes if you have to. We must release all the injustice that was brought upon us through lies. We must see it all, so we can remove it from our containers, fully sweeping out what is NOT us, and claiming what is. This is deep trigger territory but it's all for the growth of your system and the reclamation of your soul, freedom and sovereignty.
Mars retrograde (the planet of action and forward movement) continues to support this as it calls us into the cave of ourselves for reflection. It's only by seeing who we truly are that we can claim it. This is what they haven't wanted us to see, but the sweet justice is that we see it now, and once we've seen it, there's no going back. The genie is out of the bottle. Over the next few weeks when Mars stations direct on November 13, we have the support of hibernation energy. Go into the cave and see what gifts have come out of this time. We need to allow this to crystalize, like the container, so we can integrate those in December. This means sorting and organizing, what do you want to take forward and what are you leaving behind? What seeds are you planting for growth next year?
I'll make a quick pit-stop on selfishness here for a minute. It is our duty right now to reclaim and redefine what selfishness is. We have been taught, especially as women, not to be selfish — which essentially has implied: put everyone else first. Well that energy has brought us all to adrenal fatigue without any reserves. Even the suggestion on the plane is to "put your oxygen mask on first," or the baby, the birth, the thing you're creating dies. We must reclaim this nonsense about selfishness, and be reminded:
it is ONLY when your cup is already overflowing that you can give to others.
So take the time the rest of this year/winter, to sleep and indulge in major self care. Listening to the sound of your own voice. Hearing the message of your guides. Being selfish is NOT a bad word. Think of it more as being centered, rooted or anchored in self, for the purpose of serving others by offering your gifts. It's a win-win, everyone gets nourished.
Mirroring is an important aspect of the energy coming through at this time. Seeing yourself truly, madly, deeply for who you really are. This is done partially through the container energy, getting clear with your boundaries, knowing who/what stays and who/what goes. So individual work is essential at this time. However, collaboration energy is also here. Take time to yourself, but also reach out to a few key people with whom you can reflect. There's a reason women were burned at the stake, because like I say in Women's Circle: when women gather, shit gets done. We can help each other so much right now in reflecting what we see in each other, which helps to purge out the old inner, wounded stories of who we aren't, and anchor in those new gems, making that the story we live by going forward.
Suggestions for this month:
Eye-gazing — A way to embody the energy of mirroring is to actually eye-gaze with yourself in the mirror. I suggest putting on some soothing tunes and staring into your own eyes for at least the length of four songs. You will be mind blown away at what you see. Faces, animals, energy, all of it will come to the forefront. Deep intimacy resides here.
Meditate on circles — Notice all the circles in your midst. The mirror, the coffee cup, the bowl, the clock, the table, the women's circle, all the containers that are round. This will help anchor in that boundary energy.
Routine — Be fierce about your routine right now. Make yourself and your work a priority. You deserve to be at the center of your self. Hibernation is only for so long, and then we come out and socialize. It's ok to pull back. Letting go of those things we think are a priority, allow us to see what actually is.
Water — Water is hugely up right now as a healing element. Be in and around water, visit a float tank, listen to recorded sounds of water to help soothe the aches and wounds that are being excised. Take a bath imagining washing it all clean, and as you unplug the drain, say: I release anything that no longer serves me.
You're a badass, you're not alone. We've got this together. Come to Women's Circle for support November 19.
All my love and blessings, Heidi